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The Rat who is made of Stainless Steel

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I'm finding that a lot of the time I'm thinking about Lu, and this is giving me a panic feeling. I'm trying to understand why I get the panic feeling, and I'm pretty sure it's because I miss her and feel out of control. This is not a nice feeling. I spoke to her until late last night, but she seemed weird... remote.

One thing I ought to ask her is if she's OK with the time gap if I visit her at Christmas. I guess she is, but I still ought to ask.

I don't know whether to ask Lu how she's feeling about missing me, it would be interesting to know. Unfortunately she doesn't like discussing her feelings, she has made this very clear. This seems strange for a girl who spent 9 months in therapy. What did she discuss?

I'm curious, how do others feel when they are separated from a love one? e.g. from distance, or even when a relationship is ended. Do you ever feel consumed by missing them?

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For me, it's more like a quiet hole somewhere in one's body that gradually gets bigger, if that makes any sense. It aches a bit at first, but it's pretty ignorable, and certainly not worth getting obsessive or overly brooding over, but then the longer the amount of time the worse the sting..

As for long-distance relationships, that's just a sort of perpetual angst I've realized from a year of experience it's best to keep away from, personally.

That's a good explanation. I know that various factors can make that "hole" or absence grow.

Long distance relationships certainly have their issues. I guess if no future is defined in them there's little chance of anything good coming of it, and it requires two *very* motivated people. I have a good real life case that it can work though, with a friend of mine.

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